What not to do after a breakup!

So, you are going to a breakup and feel like your World is tumbling down. Well, in a way you are right. Part of your World is not the same.  You are no longer in a partnership or relationship.  You may have a broken heart or miss your partner terribly.  Just know that feeling beat up during a breakup is totally normal but, do not use it as an excuse to indulge in self destructive behavior.  Below I have added a list of a list of what not to do after the breakup:

Do not indulge in binge drinking. If you have a serious alcohol problem then I suggest that you seek professional help. On another note, going out with your friends for a few cocktails is okay. However, keep an eye on how much you drink. You don’t want to end up drunk, texting or calling your ex to later regret the things that you say to him or the way he responds to you. ‘

Do not beg to get back in to the relationship after it has been established that he/she does not wish to be with you. Have dignity and don’t lose it over someone that does not appreciate your love, company etc. Instead, spend time and nourish your relationships with your friends and family.

Do not contact your ex. Especially if you are the one making the initial contact. You need space in order to let go of the past and staying in contact daily only interferes with the process of letting go.

Seek Revenge: Resist the urge to break his car windows or get him beat up. Your actions will speak to others and you may end up involved in a legal issue.

Do not Be just friends: yes, staying friends is nice and all but refused the urge to be just friends when the break up is fresh. It hardly ever works out because strong emotions will still exist. If not from your part, it maybe from his.

Do not sleep with your ex: Resist the urge, again is a way to interfere with the breakup process.  If you still have feelings for him. He may end up just using you for the sex or vice versa; you may have no intention of staying with him and end up hurting him further.

Jump into another relationship right away: Do not walk in to another relationship after the breakup. Not all rebound relationships end badly but, most of them do. Besides, you don’t want to bring a third party in to the picture. Let’s face it, at this time you are probably more sensitive than and not as cool as you should be. Chances are that some of your unresolved emotions will affect the new relationship negatively.

Do not make drastic changes, such as cutting all your hair off or getting a permanent tattoo. At this time you may be dealing with extreme emotions and your judgment maybe a bit impaired. So, don’t make drastic decisions that you may regret later on. I remember cutting off my long mane after divorce to regret it forever because my hair took such a long time to grow back. He totally did not deserve that I acted on my impulse. In the end I was the affected party.

Don’t go public: Resist the urge to post your problems or seek revenge on social media. You are sensitive and this moment and may end up hating yourself on the long run for posting yours or his private life online. I seen a girl post everything about her relationship and even disclosed that he had been cheating with her friend to later get back with her ex. Yes, we should not care what others think but, I am sure that everyone on your friends list does not deserve to know every detail of your love life.

Best wishes!

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